Poems

Dirty, Dirty Rockstar

You saw him on your TV

A God that you had wanted

Lust that grows with peoples hatred

Every protest, and you feel insulted

He’s the man of your dreams

His words are more divine than your priests

His sound is the voice of your screams

And yet you think his style is grounded

 

He’s an angel with scabbed wings

A demon to save your world

He said he loves you like his little girl

And you felt the pain in his voice

He was the end of your misery, its dirty demise

 

Now you wear the same brand of lipstick

That he does, and the mascara he wears

His gothic black boots are your parents nightmares

He cuts himself on screen

With words too obscene

You waited in line for hours, you wanted to meet him

But he went too soon, didn’t get a chance to greet him

You were so frustrated you broke out at your parents

And spat at the guy from school who claimed you’re the dearest

That was the night you put his songs on loop

You slipped into a depressive cocoon

Of your lustful devotion

A bag of hallucinogenics and a mindful of twisted emotions

 

 

He’s an angel with scabbed wings

A demon to save your world

Watch as he lets his darkness unfurl

You wish he would be yours

Because he looks so sad and lonely

But little did you know that his story is phoney

You’d bathe in his sorrow

But all he did was piss on you

Because power always pisses on the weak

 

He’s a drug addict now and part of a scandal

He wasn’t too merciful with his groupies

And did things to them that you can’t fathom

But he’s the love of your life

And you stand by him even though he sold you lies

You thought he held your hand when you were alone

But heroes die too soon, and your models are decievers

You cut your arm for real but his blood onscreen was fake

His entire facade was built to target your emotions

 

Now you plead for the Angel

The demon you left your love and family for

You thought he was true, but he left wounds so raw

Your insecurity is his market

It’s not the sadness but the drugs that made his face rugged

You thought he would be yours

But as always, you’ve been cheated again and left alone…

 

To Wish For A Glasgow Smile

I am standing in a dark tunnel

The floor beneath me feels mushy

And a damp stench is in the air

It is how my life has been;

lately.

I have no idea what I am doing here

All I know for certain is how numb

I have become

But then the ground shook and there was tension in the air; I suppose fear is what I felt; and I was glad I could feel it

A fear of failure?

I pondered some more about life

In the damp darkness

About how it is so uncertain

Shaped by disaster;

Lead by chaos

Sometimes it seems like its been years

Since I was happy

But then I heard a sound, a sound that told me I was close to the end of the tunnel; My heart started pacing and I was glad to be alive

I paced my footsteps faster

My breath grew heavy

My sight grew dim

But I knew the path led somewhere

Somewhere; anywhere but here

Memories flashed in my mind

In fast motion

I could see all the faces of childhood again

I was running now

And my mind was hallucinating

I knew I was not far from the world I dreamed of

Adrenaline pumped through me

My legs which dragged me through cold empty streets;

Were now filled with a rage so mad

I was excited enough to exhale my lungs out

My mind for once was not distracted

It wasn’t taken over by fear

(Fear of what? Failure? Rodents? Death?)

I thought I could hear the voice of another soul closeby

And it reminded me of words such as friendship and love

Oh, how I have missed those!

And I ran like I was being chased by goblins

Or the Reaper himself

Trying to escape a terrifying life

Leave a past that has haunted me so

And walk into a dream world

Where I finally knew why I wake up every morning

And it was as if the God who had failed me all these years showed up

For I saw a light at the end of the tunnel

And tears hot as lava flowed down my face

I know knew what ‘alive’ meant

I was running fast enough to numb my brain

And screaming till I thought my throat would bleed

And my mouth was a grin so big and my eyes so wide;

My face looked like that of an alien

And then, my heart stopped.

My mouth went wide open with a waterfall of saliva

My eyes wider than ever before

My legs gave out

As I realised

There was a train coming my way…

Red

The monk had to bite his tongue

Before he could admit it to himself

He had seen the girl during the festival

And she had stayed in his mind ever since

It was the first of his innocent sins…

I wanted that rose so badly

I wrapped my flesh around its thorns

The way it stood, bright red

My hands are withered, but my heart is clean

Why did you do this to me?

He spoke to her so frequently

She seemed to him so disturbed

What is wrong, my child, he inquired

Her face twitched and made sounds absurd

Her parents had harassed her

And now all he knew was rage

I wanted that rose so badly

All my prayers were for it

The way it stood,so brightly

My mind is without peace, but my heart is clean

Why did you do this to me?

They decided to end her misery

He was man enough to help her

He broke into her house and killed her parents

She looked at him and smiled and that smile was treasure

But the smile melted away

And her eyes turned sinister

I wanted that rose so badly

I betrayed my God for it

But still it stood with so much pride

My conscience is stained, but my heart is clean

Why did you do this to me?

They put him on the stake next day

All the monks and villagers

She was there too, with a smile

He was treated like the killers and pillagers

They burnt him while they cheered

And he wept through his final moments

I wanted that rose so badly

I traded my life for it

But it stood like nothing had happened

My body burns, but my heart is clean

Why did you do this to me?

A Toast To The Dead

This is a toast to the dead

To those who were killed

Because they spoke their minds

Those who were killed

Because they spoke against irrationally 

Against division, against superstition 

Rationalists and humanitarians

Who wished to see peace

Who spoke against blind faith

But were slaughtered for honour and righteousness 

I wish to ask the killers and their justifiers 

‘Did you kill on God’s command?’

‘Is your faith greater than another’s life?’

‘Is your faith so fragile, that mere words and cartoons can shake it?’

You can kill the atheists and kill the freethinkers 

But you will alienate your own followers

Don’t look at the Middle East

The land of extremism could soon be ours

This a toast to the fearless revolutionaries

Their sacrifice will never be forgotten 

Men die, women die but ideas don’t 

They died for our sins

Now their blood is our ink

Fear

The fear that grips us

Is terrifying, not just in magnitude 

But in its frequency as well

The cold, scaly hands of terror

Grips us for most our life

Like a chain that holds back a dog

Fear is like pouring icy water on your head

On a cold winter morning 

It leaves you shivering and helpless

The fear of authority silences us

Like a whip crashing on a dog

Cutting across its flesh 

Because it barks too loud 

The fear of isolation and ostracisation 

Of being called a freak and made fun of

Holds the rebel in us back

Forcefully pushing us into the majority 

The fear of failure 

Might help us excel in any field

But also stops us from exploring new ones

It is fear that acts as the driving force 

In our life, coupled with desire 

Almost all our decisions are based on them

But very often fear wins over desire

The fear of shattering a carefully built social image

And of incurring the wrath of majority

Might stop a person from marrying someone they love

Faith is sold with the fear of hell

We obey and do ‘good’ out of fear itself 

Fear accompanies us throughout our life

Like a shadow that you can’t get rid of

For where there is light, there will be one

We do not let the light enter us after all…

On Poetry

Poetry is prayer for the Godless

It is communication for the junkies

It is the way of life for hippies

Poetry is where words merge together

Lines have no beginnings and no end

It defies form and sometimes logic

It breaks the rules

Poetry is the language of rebellion 

Portrayal of beauty

A reflection of life

A moment of thought

An exercise of emotion and grammar

Poetry is chaos

Where reality and imaginary have no difference 

A collection of random sentences

That can create perspective or alter it…

Oldboy

He sat in his armchair by the window 

Looking at the brand new world outside

Different from the world he remembered 

This was the world of indifference 

Where communication was a weapon

And the youngsters knew how to use it

They were always ready for an argument 

And spoke in exclamatory gutturals

They never cared about making themselves understood 

They loved to be misunderstood 

The rewards of obscurity outweighed clarity

They did not believe in tradition

He had seen Burkha clad teenagers smoking

On their way home from school

Speaking merrily about their date later on

It shocked him. It amused him.

The world seemed to move at a dizzying pace

The city of his teenage was a drug and disco paradise

Opium dens and brothels dotted the landscape

But there was no rebellion like the one he was witnessing 

It was about apathy and partial understanding 

The disco had died but the city continued to sway to a beat

A dark mundane beat reverberating every street

From the prostitutes to the billionaires

They all said the same thing in different ways

‘Dance, idiot, dance. Dance or you die’
~NocturnalReflections 

Regrets

I was standing near my room

Early morning, looking for you

We had had a fight the previous night

I wanted to say sorry to you

It was still your fault

But now it just seemed too trivial

There were people in the hallway

Standing in groups and talking

In a mumbled buzz

It was 3 am

And my head was swirling

I just wanted to find you

Hold you and take you back with me

So I took off from the hotel

There were people in groups everywhere

I didn’t approach them

You were the only thing on my mind

Finally I reached the beach

More people here, more groups

And a louder buzz

My head began to ache

There was panic in my heart

I paced to the shore still pretty drowsy

That’s when I saw you

Lying on the beach

People all around you

They pulled the white cloth off your face

You had the same clothes you wore last night

Someone said

‘So sad, wonder why she did it’

‘Someone heard her quarreling last night’

I collapsed with a thousand thoughts swirling in my head

Wishing all this were a dream

A bad dream on a beautiful beach

Rage

Seething anger bursts inside

There’s a monstrous rage growling

Fantasising destruction 

There’s not much to do

And the constant nagging bugs me

Purposeless existence

A nihilistic sloth

It becomes a rebellion 

Rebel against what?

Why are you so angry they ask

So naively, it fuels my violent tendencies 

Fuming. Disastrous. Hatred.

My thoughts become a senseless word salad

A melting pot of rage

Emotionally crippled

I look for an escape

Hope I do, before I explode.