An Ode To The Almighty 

I speak on behalf of all celestial beings

This is a prayer to thee,

The Master of all

Beyond whom nothing exists

You’re like a Buddhist monk

One who walks with utter peace and serenity 

Unperturbed by the happenings of his surroundings 

His consciousness on a higher spiritual plane

And his movements so subtle 

Even his shadow cannot mimic the grace

But even he, my Lord, knows

That you’re above him 

No being born in this cosmos

Goes one day without thinking of you once

You’re in the minds of all

Striking fear in some, an utter awe in others

Our only absolute certainty in a life of chaos 

But you remain silent

Undisturbed.

You judge no one 

You respond never,

But you’re there.

Ever present.

The cries or the prayers never affect you 

No man has been born 

No matter how rich, or talented ,

To be able to escape your awareness

You’re ultimate

No war or bloodshed could shake you 

No tears could leave you disturbed

You walk your path and pick us up in your eternal cusp

The predator or prey, man or woman , a child with a terminal disease 

They are all the same in your mystic eyes

I acknowledge your presence

I bow down before you, my almighty

Lead us one by one out of misery and lust,

This is my prayer to you, Death.

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Carcinoma

22/12/2015

 

Its just another day with very little sleep

Another night of horrible nightmares

Another day of violent vomiting and nausea

Another day in the Land of Malady

It’s been like this for a while now

My body has become a wasteland

A host

 

In me grows my baby

I still remember the day

When the doc said I was pregnant

It was a day of such simple joy

But all too soon came the news

A crushing blow

 

My body was also a host

To an emotionless alien

Growing, spreading inside me

Eating my insides and corroding my immunity

My heart sank when the doc said it

‘Cancer’

 

And that’s the day the battle began

A beautiful soul growing in me

A human life, soon to be born

With dreams and hope and love

Together with a being whose sole purpose

Was to kill

 

‘Life is a race’ they say

Yes, and I’m a finalist already

But I have to run for the life that lives inside

Outlive the monster, I tell myself

But it keeps growing

Its will as inhuman as its purpose

Pure evil

 

I give up sometimes

‘Just begin with the treatment’ they say

But it endangers the life of the child as well

The thing, it has spread its claws on both of us

I shed tears, of desperation

Of guilt and sometimes of joy

When I feel my child move inside

It is a little triumph of life

A little nudge reminding me to carry on

‘Be a fighter mom!’

I dream my child say with a smile on an angelic face

And then I see the face begin to rot

It’s like even my brain is full of venom

I hope my child wins

Hope.

Regrets

I was standing near my room

Early morning, looking for you

We had had a fight the previous night

I wanted to say sorry to you

It was still your fault

But now it just seemed too trivial

There were people in the hallway

Standing in groups and talking

In a mumbled buzz

It was 3 am

And my head was swirling

I just wanted to find you

Hold you and take you back with me

So I took off from the hotel

There were people in groups everywhere

I didn’t approach them

You were the only thing on my mind

Finally I reached the beach

More people here, more groups

And a louder buzz

My head began to ache

There was panic in my heart

I paced to the shore still pretty drowsy

That’s when I saw you

Lying on the beach

People all around you

They pulled the white cloth off your face

You had the same clothes you wore last night

Someone said

‘So sad, wonder why she did it’

‘Someone heard her quarreling last night’

I collapsed with a thousand thoughts swirling in my head

Wishing all this were a dream

A bad dream on a beautiful beach

Just R.I.P

‘Respect the dead!’

They say

It is a virtue much desired by many

They paint their suicide victims 

As some kind of angels or saviours

Why? Why respect the dead?

Why respect a pile of rotting meat?

It is not going to benefit anyone

Especially the carcass you pay respects to!

Let’s instead focus on what’s alive

Let’s not let the lives of those around rot

While we pay respects to dead meat

Out of some kind of a social obligation 

Don’t mourn someones death

Celebrate their life instead 

What’s the point of treating someone like shit 

And when they die offer them prayers?

What is the subtext of this?

Are you telling people that the only way to be respected

Is to die? Isn’t that pro-suicide?

Don’t let the lives of people go waste

Don’t ignore the cauldrons of talent, love and hope

Don’t let them go unheard…

P.S. This meme hits the nail on the topic as well! From a different angle though

  

On Enlightenment and Ship of Theseus

So I recently saw Anand Gandhi’s Ship of Theseus and was quite baffled and, to be honest, a little dissatisfied with the ending. The movie is visually stunning and philosophically challenging in some ways but the rather ambiguous ending made me think about the way the entire movie is structured, focus on particular scenes and try and find some ulterior motives behind some of the seemingly innocent symbols. The entire movie which revolves around three character stories who undergo organ transplants and face conflicts has the underlying theme of life and identity. The fact that every character who undergoes an organ transplant faces conflicts regarding their identity and purpose of existence is so well portrayed that you as a viewer can’t help but introspect and find meaning and maybe a reflection in this movie. The title of the movie refers to The Theseus Paradox
If Theseus’s ship is damaged and the damaged parts are replaced by new parts is it still the same ship?
If the discarded parts are used to build an entirely new ship then which of the two is the actual Ship of Theseus?

In all three stories the characters reach a stage of conflict. Is creativity nature or nurture? Is it fair to kill a being to save another, no matter how small or insignificant the being might be? Is it fair to ditch an ideology that you’ve been following and preaching your entire life? What really is our greatest motivation, money or humanity? Can money buy happiness and/or justice?
I think questions are what pave the path to enlightenment. Does quest for truth always begin with conflict? Seems so. And if so, should this conflict always be a Heart vs Mind conflict?

IMG_0956

The ending of the movie shows a video of a man walking through a cave with a flashlight. As I said, it’s an ambiguous ending. I believe the ending might be a reference to Plato’s Allegory of the Clave. The story of the clave is about a group of individuals who have been imprisoned, since their birth, in a cave and tied with chains in such a way that they cannot view themselves or their surroundings but only the blank wall they face. Behind them is a fire by a low wall. People walk into the clave behind the wall carrying puppets in such a way that shadows are cast on the blank wall thanks to the fire, but only of the puppets that they carry. As these shadows are the only thing the prisoners ever see, that is the only idea they have about reality. If a prisoner is freed and taken out into the world, he’ll reach a state of extreme conflict as to what reality actually is. Eventually he’ll get adjusted to the light, life and colours of the actual reality and taking pity on the imprisoners would want to free them. However, upon entering the cave he is blinded by the darkness just as he was by the light when he was taken out of it. The prisoners upon hearing of the plight of the freed man who is now incapable of seeing ‘reality’ (the dancing shadows of the cave) would develop a fear of the outer world and would never want to leave the cave.
However, when the man walks into cave with a flashlight, the problem of being blinded is solved and the other prisoners are introduced to a new reality sans the conflict. This tool, technology, bridges the gap between the actual reality and our one dimensional perspective of it. One of the best scenes in the film is of the blind photographer using a device that reads out instructions to her so she can use the device for editing her photographs with great ease. Very few people know that this idea is actually an in-film invention and one that hasn’t been implemented yet.
Is technology our way to enlightenment? Is enlightenment Googleable? Will we, as the Posthuman theory states, build an ultra intelligent machine, one that surpasses all our intellectual abilities and lead us all out of the dark cave we are imprisoned in? A machine , after all, is built with a purpose. It’s identity is defined in a few technical terms. It leads a simple existence and will never face the Mind vs Heart conflict. What kind of enlightenment will that be then?

Lost In The Moment

He and She were in the garden
Sitting under a tree
By a quiet mound
Sitting quietly
He held her hand
She shivered
And gave him a delicate nudge
A faint smile broke across their faces
She let go of his hand
Picked a flower from nearby
And began playing with it
He sat watching her quietly
There was romantic tension in the air
Suddenly He wrapped his arm around her
Pulled her closer to himself
It was the first time they were enjoying
Since their infant died
The boy had climbed a table
And walked out of the window
Fallen down to his death…
She was giggling as He pulled her closer
It was a relief for him to see her not crying anymore
She placed her palm on his face
And stared into his eyes
Tired they were
They had been all this time
But now there was life in them
They had made it through
And were happy again
Cuddled very close to each other
Listening to the sound of their breathing
Lost in a moment of heavenly love
Finding ultimate solace in each other’s company

They heard bustling of leaves
A chick fell from the tree
Rolled down the mound
Right next to them
There were ants all around it
Feeding on its flesh
Hollow eyes with worms piled inside
It was twitching with the activity inside
Putrid stench emanating from the carcass
She was on her knees, crying
He kicked the corpse in a fit of rage
She wept hysterically
Shattered and helpless
He stood in silence…